Dicks, and other stories!

Well folks, we might as well get the week off to a good start ........, even though it is a holiday today!

HERE'S ANOTHER HEADLINE THAT'S AN ATTEMPT BY THE GAY COMMUNITY TO GET THEMSELVES THOUGHT OF AS MORE "MAINSTREAM" THAN THEY REALLY ARE: Why Straight Men Have Sex With Each Other!

Your ever humble reporter isn't going to get into the nitty-gritty of this book because it has a definite gay agenda, but, there is one paragraph that sort of rings true! "There does seem to be this idea that women can do it without being seen as gay, while with men, either there’s some explanation that can explain it, or they’re gay and just don’t realize or won’t acknowledge it."

While there is a lot of truth to that statement bunky, there is something else that reinforces how men, in general, view sex ..............., a ménage à trois!

Yup, you get two women and one guy in the sack and the vast majority of men will find this extremely "interesting," but ..........., put a guy in bed with another man and woman (A wrong way  ménage à trois) and suddenly it's not so great!!!!

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WHILE WE'RE ON THE SUBJECT OF SEX:  Reports from "The Superficial' today claims that all is well in the land of  Justin Beiber!


Yesterday, reports were flying around that Justin Bieber’s lawyers were threatening legal action against anyone posting photos of his uncensored naked penis. Except you can just go ahead and ignore that because Justin Bieber wants people to see his dick now that almost everyone was forced to acknowledge it exists and surprisingly isn’t the size of a Tic-Tac. TMZ reports:

Our sources say Justin’s anger faded when the pics went viral … for one seemingly larger than average reason: Bieber’s a really big deal, and we’re told he’s happy the world knows it now.
As we reported, JB’s lawyers threatened media outlets that published the pics. We’re told his legal team was just doing its job … sending the message that Justin’s not okay with the violation. But reality is, there’s almost zero chance Justin sues … ’cause as they say, size matters.

 http://www.thesuperficial.com/justin-bieber-naked-penis-uncensored-lawsuit-proud-big-dick-10-2015

(Now here's the straight poop on this rather sordid story folks, YES, it looks like the kid has a really big dick, but don't let that fool ya ..........., he's only four feet tall, and this makes the proportions all seem out of whack! [sic] -Ed.)

[Did I ever tell ya the story about a midget that had an enormous dick but never got laid so much as once in his life, because whenever he got a hard-on there would not be enough blood left over for his brain, and this would cause him to black out before anything could happen. Poor guy killed himself at the tender age of nineteen.]

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This just in, hot off thepages of Gawker!

Just before puking and just after allegedly crashing his car into a house, Florida resident Reliford Cooper reportedly told the police arresting him on DUI charges that he was not the person driving his car. In fact, Cooper said, a person wasn’t behind the wheel at all. “My dog was driving that car,” he said, according to WFTS.

The accident took place Wednesday night, when a Manatee County deputy tried to pull Cooper over after the purported dog owner allegedly ran a red light. In the process of fleeing the officer, Cooper allegedly drove into one ditch, overcorrected, drove through another ditch, and then into a nearby home. Then he took off. From WFTS:

Cooper got out and started running behind the homes, according to deputies. A K9 tracked the man and found Cooper’s T-shirt in front of a church at 1720 18th Street East.

Shortly after, a pastor from the church located a deputy and told her someone was hiding in the bathroom inside the church. Churchgoers forced the man out, and the deputy took him into custody.

As he was being arrested, Cooper allegedly had a few questions for officers. “Who was chasing me?” he asked. “You’re slow as shit.” Later, he tried to explain the crash and the subsequent chase.

“My dog was driving that car,” he said. “I ran because I wanted to. You ain’t gonna find no drugs or guns on me.”

WFTS reports that shortly after finishing that statement Cooper began to vomit. Police said both Cooper and the crashed car smelled strongly of alcohol and weed. Cooper was arrested and charged with DUI, aggravated fleeing, and leaving the scene of an accident.

(No dog was found at the scene ...., police suspect he made a clean getaway!)

 http://gawker.com/allegedly-stoned-man-arrested-for-dui-tells-cops-his-do-1736069050