(You might remember Indiana Jones once said, “SNAKES! Why did it have to be snakes? I hate snakes!” Well let me tell ya something boys and girls, mine is spiders!)
I was on my way to bed and stopped for that last late night pee before hitting the sack, when I opened the toilet seat and saw……………, a spider!
Now I don’t mean “an itsy, bitsy spider, that went up and down the spout” kids.
No sir!
I mean a spider like I had never seen a spider in a house before.
This son-of-a-bitch was the size of a TARANTULA, except with smooth legs and body!
I kid you not, it had a body about the size of my fingernail, and legs that were a good two or three inches across.
I have no idea how it got in the toilet bowl folks, but I CAN tell ya what it was doing in there ladies and gentlemen …………………, it was the backstroke! And on top of everything else, I could swear I heard the fucking thing hissing at me!!!!!!!!!!
Yup, there it was, swimming around in the toilet bowl, hissing at me and looking for a way out.
I was so shocked I stood there frozen!
When I finally got my wits about me again, I flushed the toilet eight times to make sure the thing was gone!
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Now I’m afraid to go to bed!