According to the Perspective Naked news Department, the man was at the Downtown Hotel Saturday night drinking the infamous Sourtoe Cocktail, which involves swigging a shot of whiskey with a human toe in the glass and allowing the toe to touch the drinker’s lips.
This time, the patron swallowed the digit — on purpose.

4146-Religious-Adam-Covering-His-Sexual-Organ-Penis-With-A-Leaf-ClipartThe hotel’s so-called toe captain, Terry Lee, performed the drink ceremony, and said the man took the shot, gulped down the toe and then slapped $500 dollars on the counter, the fine for swallowing the appendage.
“He stands up, reaches in his pocket, and takes five $100 bills and slams it on the table and starts walking away. And I said ‘Where’s the toe?’ And he said, ‘I swallowed it,”‘ Lee said, describing the event.
Lee said the fine has since been increased to $2,500, to provide more of a deterrent because now the hotel only has one toe left.
The two shrivelled brown toes have rotated, with one in use and the other stored in coarse salt.
“Right now the toe we are using, we are going to be using it continuously, and it’s going to deteriorate. We’re going to have to get rid of that toe once it starts falling apart,” Lee said.
The tradition started in 1973 after a toe believed to belong to a prohibition-era rum runner was found in a cabin by boat captain Dick Stevenson, prompting him to start the “Sourtoe Cocktail Club”.
According to the Sourtoe Cocktail Club website, the toe was originally placed in a beer glass full of champagne. But the rules have changed over the decades and the Sourtoe can now be had with any drink, even non-alcoholic ones.
One rule remains the same, however: “You can drink it fast, you can drink it slow — but the lips have gotta touch the toe.”
(From now on, customers will also have to “toe the line!”-Ed.)

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If I can keep this straight…………………, a bunch of anti-abortionists were rumoured to be taking jars of shit to throw around the Texas Legislature yesterday, but they claimed the report was all a bunch of shit!
When asked, point blank, if they were prepared to spread excrement around the committee room, their answer was: “Hell no, that’s a bunch of shit!”
One of the legislators then said: “you mean there’s no shit?”
To which they replied: “Shit, no!”
They then went on to explain that if any shit did appear, it would not be their fault, it would just be “one of those things,” because as everybody knows……., “shit happens!”
The members of the committee then had a discussion as to whether the protesters were shittin’ them or not, and decided the whole issue was a bunch of crap.
(They then recessed for lunch!)
dynamic_resizeIf you live around Barrie, and you get a little horny, DON’T attempt to do something about it with THIS woman! –>

Jennifer Murphy, 40, of no fixed address, had unprotected sex with a bunch of guys without revealing she is infected with the HIV virus, a court heard Tuesday.
She was a possible candidate for the sentence of a dangerous offender designation reserved for dangerous repeat criminals after she was recently found guilty of aggravated sexual assault, but the Crown Prosecutor changed his mind!.
During her trial court heard how Murphy hung around convenience stores in downtown Barrie and offered to have sex with men – sometimes for $20, sometimes for nothing.
Three men testified no condom was used and they were terrified after they learned about Murphy’s HIV infection.
The judge only convicted her in one of the incidents.
(I don’t know what hookers charge here in London, but I’m damned sure it’s more than twenty bucks! Also, this woman is not all that bad looking, so I’m sure that with a bit of effort, she could have gotten at least fifty bucks!-Ed.)
MONTREAL – It was mass-murder threats allegedly uttered aboard a Toronto-to-Istanbul flight that led to serious charges against a Turkish national, QMI Agency has learned.

dynamic_resize“You will hear ‘bang bang’ and everyone is going to die,” a flight attendant was told on Air Transat flight TS100, a source says.
The pilot of the Airbus A330 with 316 passengers on board turned back 90 minutes out of Montreal’s Trudeau Airport on Sunday.
Dogan Akkaya, 25, of Toronto, was arrested and charged with committing a hoax regarding terrorist activity as well as assault, threats and criminal harassment. The terror-related charge could land him a 10-year-prison term.
Sources tell QMI that the disturbance began shortly after the flight departed Montreal at 6:35 p.m. on Sunday. A man tried to go to the toilet during takeoff, but was stopped by a flight attendant, provoking an altercation.
Akkaya’s bail hearing, scheduled for Tuesday, was postponed after his lawyer requested a psychiatric evaluation.
Quebec Court Judge Jean-Paul Braun agreed to the evaluation, which irked the defendant.
“I do not have psychiatric problems,” Akkaya said in Turkish. “I did not kill anyone, I did not hit anyone, I apologized to the crew.”
The defendant then launched into a rant about his dreams, and also asked that Turkish officials intervene in the matter.
A friend of Akkaya’s told reporters the defendant had psychiatric problems and that he was travelling to Turkey to seek mental help at his mother’s request.
“(Akkaya) doesn’t want to admit it, but he’s depressed,” the friend said.
(Listen folks, we ALL get depressed at times ……………….., this guy is NUTS! -Ed.)

Most of Canada will get a nice, warm autumn, but meteorologists say Atlantic Canada should brace for an onslaught of storms.
dynamic_resizeAccording to The Weather Network’s annual fall outlook, autumn will bring a long stretch of “warm, summer conditions” between Quebec and the Prairies, followed by “spells of cool and wet weather” as the season comes to a close.
“Cyclical weather patterns like we saw this summer are likely to continue into the fall for most parts of the country,” Chris Scott, chief meteorologist at The Weather Network, said in a press release. “Most of Canada should enjoy warm, dry stretches in September, but on cue the weather will start to change quickly as we go into October and November.”
rererrCentral Canadian youngsters won’t have to bundle up to head back to school. Between the Prairies and Ontario, warm weather is expected to continue well into the Labour Day weekend.

But plan your long-weekend excursions carefully.
“Most parts of the country should get at least two rain-free days out of three this long weekend, but thunderstorms will be a threat at times particularly from Manitoba across the Great Lakes into the St. Lawrence valley. A low pressure system off the B.C. coast will bring the chance of showers to coastal areas,” the outlook reads.
B.C. can expect above-normal temperatures in most areas, but will face above normal-precipitation, too. Canada’s territories will follow their record-hot summer with a warmer-than-usual fall in most regions.
But Atlantic Canadians are in for a rough one. Meteorologists predict a higher-than-average number of storms during peak hurricane season in September.
SPEAKING OF WEATHER:  The Nunatsiaq News posted a photo on its Facebook page taken around 4:45 a.m., and said the temperature at the time was -1 C.

dynamic_resizeThe temperature was only expected to reach 7 C later in the day, with warnings of winds gusting to as high as 80 km/h.
But the capital is not the first place in the territory to get snow this month.
Alert military station, some 2,000 km to the north, already has 17 cm on the ground. The temperature there reached an August record low of -12.7 C on Saturday, which Nunatsiaq News says is the third-lowest August temperature reading ever recorded around sea level in North America.
MITCHELL, Ont. – A garden tractor is a motor vehicle and you shouldn’t be driving it down the centre of a public road after you’ve been drinking.
A southern Ontario resident was reminded of that yesterday when the John Deere riding mower he was operating in Mitchell, a small farming community just north of London,, was stopped by an off-duty officer.
imagesCAT2333UThe driver of the tractor displayed obvious signs of impairment, said police.
On-duty officers who were called in arrested the 84-year-old driver, who later failed two breath tests.
He has been charged with impaired driving, driving with an blood-alcohol level over 80 mg and driving while disqualified.


AND FINALLY! Do ya remember that TV show Candid Camera? (Either the original with Allan Funt, or the newer one, with what’s-his-name?)

I came up with the absolute best stunt ever for that show the other day, but I have to figure out how to do it!!!!

untitledIt would involve taking close-ups of people’s faces as they were having a crap, (Or bowel movement, for the more delicate amongst you!) and then turning it into a compilation that would be the funniest thing ever put on T.V.

The only problem is that I can’t figure out how to do it without getting arrested………………, or sued…….., or both!

(Is there something wrong with me?)