Here’s a good Halloween story kids, we have a man that can’t come back from the dead!
FINDLAY, Ohio — A man who disappeared decades ago is finding out there’s no easy way to come back from the dead.
Donald Miller Jr. went to court this week to ask a county judge to reverse a 1994 ruling that declared him legally dead after he had vanished from his home eight years earlier.
untitledBut the judge turned down his request, citing a three-year time limit for changing a death ruling. Hancock County Probate Court Judge Allan Davis called it a “strange, strange situation.”"We’ve got the obvious here.  A man sitting in the courtroom, he appears to be in good health,” said Davis, who told Miller the three-year limit was clear.”I don’t know where that leaves you, but you’re still deceased as far as the law is concerned,” the judge said.

Miller resurfaced about eight years ago and went to court so that he could get a driver’s license and reinstate his Social Security number.
His ex-wife had opposed the move, saying she doesn’t have the money to repay the Social Security benefits that were paid out to her and the couple’s two children after Miller was declared dead. Robin Miller said her former husband vanished because he owed big child support payments and that the overdue payments had totaled $26,000 by 1994, The (Findlay) Courier reported.
Miller, 61, told the judge that he disappeared in the 1980s because he had lost his job and he was an alcoholic. He lived in Florida and Georgia before returning to Ohio around 2005.His parents told him about his “death” when he came back to the state, he said.”It kind of went further than I ever expected it to,” Miller said.  “I just kind of took off, ended up in different places.”
Miller’s attorney said he may be able to challenge the Social Security Administration in federal court, but does not have the financial resources to do so.
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By | Daily Brew

untitledLet me set the scene. Police find 80-year-old woman suffering from dementia wandering the streets of Mississauga, Ont., aimlessly at 3:30 in the morning clutching a bread knife.
The three Peel Regional Police officers confronting Iole Pasquale could not persuade her to drop the knife. The solution, stun her with a Taser. Twice.
Pasquale falls to the ground. She drops the knife but also breaks her hip.
And that’s OK, apparently, as far as Ontario’s Special Investigations Unit (SIU) is concerned.
The SIU’s investigation into the Aug. 28 incident concluded that deploying the high-voltage stun gun against Pasquale was a “reasonable” use of force and should not be subject to criminal charges.
Dear Readers: Why couldn’t things be like this when I went to school!!!!!!!!!!!!
COLUMBUS, Ga. (AP) — The headmaster of a school in Columbus says he plans to cancel classes Friday because of great weather.
untitledThe off day at Calvary Christian School is the result of a commitment headmaster Len McWilliams said he made to find a positive reason to cancel classes before he retires at the end of the year.

McWilliams told the Ledger-Enquirer of Columbus he’s canceled school because of bad weather for years, and thought he should eventually cancel classes because the weather is just too nice for students and staff to be cooped up all day.
“This is a once in a lifetime thing, I really don’t know of other places that have done that, but it was something the Lord put on my heart just to bless the families and the children and the teachers,” McWilliams told local television station WTVM. “I don’t know who’s the most excited about that, just to have that time to be together and to focus on doing something special with their families
The forecast for the Columbus area calls for sunny skies and a temperature of more than 80 degrees.

OK, OK, I know you already heard the news, but I feel we would be remiss for if we didn’t congratulate Alice Munroe for her excellent achievement!
imagesCanada’s Alice Munro has won this year’s Nobel Prize in literature. Munro was awarded the prize for her short stories that focus on the frailties of the human condition, the prize committee reported.
The jury honoured Munro as a “master of the contemporary short story”.
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Speaking of the Nobel prize, we just read this press release with a certain amount of disbelief!
A once-obscure international organization that was thrust into the global limelight this year when it was handed the task of securing and eliminating Syria’s chemical weapons has won the 2013 Nobel Peace Prize.

What sort of crap is that kids?
imagesAnybody, and everybody we have talked to here at the Perspective Research Department, and the Naked News staff, were certain that it would go to that Pakistani girl Malala Yousafzaiwho, was shot in the head by the Taliban for supporting girl’s education!
This girl showed amazing courage and bravery for standing up to those savages………………………….., plus I bet it hurt like hell!

yasmin-nakhudaTORONTO – The saga of the Ikea monkey appears to be far from over.
A judge ruled last month that Yasmin Nakhuda could not get Darwin the monkey back after he escaped from her car in December outside an Ikea store in Toronto.

imagesCA7IO18CBut Nakhuda, who refers to herself as the monkey’s “mom,” is now taking her case to Ontario’s highest court, where her lawyers filed a notice of appeal this week.
(The monkey is quoted as saying that since the case is still before the courts, it did not have any comment!)
Now here’s a load of crap if we every heard it!
A dairy farm in western Newfoundland is harnessing the power of cow patties to create power.
New World Dairy in St. David’s has a special $5 million digester that breaks down the waste of its 1,200 cows.

gg65812425New World Dairy President Brent Chaffey hopes the provincial government will buy the company’s excess power. (CBC)
“We can produce about four million kilowatt hours of electricity annually,” company president Brent Chaffey said.
He told CBC News he had been looking into the unique way of creating electricity for years.
“I first became aware of it in 1989 and was quite interested in it,” Chaffey said, “Recognizing that it wasn’t something that we could utilize for quite some time into the future, if at all.”

His staff travelled to Europe and North America to see how others made use of anaerobic digesters.
The process uses high heat and water to turn manure into power.
‘We can produce about four million kilowatt hours of electricity annually’- Brent Chaffey
The green energy created will be able to power his farm, and then some, however at this point no one can sell excess power back to the grid in Newfoundland and Labrador.
“We’d like to be able to sell it into the grid, as we require for our own purposes only about 20 or 25 per cent, so we are 75 per cent surplus to our needs, [now] we are waiting on a policy decision from the Department of Natural Resources,” Chaffey said.
In addition to power, the project also creates nutrient-rich water for crops, and fertilizer for cow beds.
The Perspective Research Department came across this picture of a redneck apartment building up in the Smokey Mountains!

Watch this woman get booted from the train for holding the doors open!