Allan's Perspective is not recommended for the politically correct, or the overly religious! Some people have opinions, and some have convictions ..., what we offer is Perspective! (Sometimes I feel like I'm just a bobble-head on the highway of life!)

I was addicted to the hokey pokey, but I turned myself around! ("If it is true that humans share 44% of their DNA with bananas, then how, when, and why did it become so much more difficult to drive a stick-shift? Answer me that , eh!")

Friday, December 4, 2015

I told ya it was a conspiracy!

Dear Readers:

I'm saying this on the down-low, and on the Q.T., because I don't  know exactly how much influence and power CNN has up here in Canada,  but it always struck me as strange that whenever we have a crisis like the one going on in San Bernadino right now, CNN has their ratings go thru the roof, and they make all sorts of money from increased advertising. (Why else do you think they stay on that one news story for days on end........? Why, the money, of course!)

On a hunch I had the Perspective Research Department, along with members of the Naked News Staff do a bit of digging into all these horrific shootings that have been going on for a number of years now. After a rather exhaustive investigation we have come to the conclusion that CNN was behind all of them! (That's right kids,  the conspiracy theorists had it right all along ......, CNN is orchestrating all these crises to increase their ratings, and thereby their ad revenue.)

This is also why these mass shootings are coming with increased frequency folks, just like a drug addict who needs more of a fix to get the same effect, so to does CNN need more and more of these dastardly deeds to satisfy their increasing need to report atrocities ....., all in the pursuit of the almighty advertising dollar!

Yup, your ever vigilant reporter thought there was something strange about this whole gun control mess, and now it turns out that I was right! (Just remember bunky, ya heard it here first! -Ed.)