There was a guy driving between Edmonton and Calgary on the weekend ……………., in a snowstorm ……………, driving too fast ………….., and all over the road!
Seems this asshole was ‘texting’ while driving, and had his laptop on the dash so he could watch a comedy show!
asshole trophy

(Oh, did I mention that he was also sipping a coffee?)
The cops didn’t find it too funny and fined him $172- for distracted driving, and looking into a charge of dangerous driving!.
Unfortunately, there is no fine or penalty for being an “Asshole!”
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Folks, it doesn’t really matter where ya live today, the weather is shitty ……………………., stay inside!
Welcome to Canada!
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ku-xlargeThis handsome-looking chap doesn’t look a day over 40—but in fact he’s 5,500 years old. This is a startlingly life-like reconstruction of a prehistoric skull buried near the UK’s Stonehenge which is 5,500 years old.
Scientists did an investigation of the guy and found out he was a chariot salesman from what is now Wales,  and he was killed in a traffic accident on the main road to Stonehenge, while on his way to a sales convention!
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After a quick look around the Internet today. I found out that Hitler is still alive and living in Argentina, and former Boxer Evander Holyfield just informed us that homosexuality is a handicap, and can be fixed by a doctor!
(Just so ya know!)
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AND: An Aussie bloke who climbed naked into a top-loader washing machine in an attempt to surprise his other half provided a top afternoon’s entertainment for local emergency services.

untitledThe unnamed chap from Mooroopna, some 180km north of Melbourne, apparently decided it was a bit of a wheeze to conceal himself inside the appliance last Saturday afternoon and wait for his missus to come home, presumably then leaping squeaky-clean from the machine to her immense delight.
Instead, he got so firmly trapped he required professional extraction. It’s not clear who made the emergency call, but “police, firefighters, paramedics, SES (State Emergency Service)” and a Search and Rescue Squad from nearby Shepparton enthusiastically responded.
Shepparton police Sergeant Michelle De Araugo said: “He was very well wedged in there and we were concerned for his health and wellbeing.”
Mercifully, after 20 minutes and an olive oil lube job, he was freed. “It would be fair to say the gentleman was very embarrassed,” De Araugo noted.
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2014/01/06/greased_aussie/
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imagesCAULA159The Perspective Research Department has discovered that most of the “Eco” and Environmental” activists campaigning against the XL and Gateway pipelines, as well as  anti-fracking groups, and almost any organization that opposes fossil fuels, are in fact secretly “Amish” groups attempting to gain new recruits!
Remember that the next time ya run into a tree hugger!
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A barber in Detroit wants to set a new world record by doing 35 haircuts in one hour.
WHAT’S THE BIG DEAL?
Even I could do that!
(As long as they were all “buzz-cuts!”)
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Folks, I just read this article …………………., and after you take a look, I will make a few comments!
Innovative alcohol abuse treatment programs in Amsterdam and Vancouver are abandoning the idea of abstinence, instead letting chronic alcoholics have a few drinks to help them control and regulate their habit.
A project spearheaded by the city of Amsterdam and a local NGO called the Rainbow Group offers beer in exchange for cleaning up litter in a city park that is a frequent gathering spot for alcoholics.
In addition to the five beers given to each so-called “paper picker” over the course of a shift, the program — which currently employs about 20 alcoholics — also provides them with a meal and 10 euros for their work.
Organizer Janet van der Noord said the project has two goals: to clean up the park and to improve the lives of the alcoholics who would otherwise gather there to drink.

drunk3“They have structure … they have a healthy meal, which is good … they’re happy that they have something to do, they’re not bored the whole day … and we see also a change in their lives,” van der Noord said in a documentary that aired on CBC Radio’s The Current.
Bernie Pauly, a professor at the University of Victoria and a scientist with the Centre for Addictions Research of British Columbia, said these kinds of programs help reduce harm for people with severe alcohol addiction.
Pauly studies the impact of Vancouver’s “managed alcohol programs,” or MAPs, where chronic alcoholics are given wine, beer or spirits as part of treatment. She said at least six of these programs currently exist in Canada.
In an interview with The Current host Ana Maria Tremonti, Pauly said managed alcohol programs are helpful for people with a long history of chronic alcoholism – they may have undergone treatment several times, but were unsuccessful.
“In many cases, abstinence treatment has really not been effective for this group of people,” Pauly said. “It’s really an option to assist people to live a better quality of life and to reduce those harms that go with drinking.”
Dr. Mark Weiss, the medical director of Bellwood Health Services in Toronto, said that these kinds of managed alcohol programs can complement traditional abstinence programs.
“I think one of the things that we sometimes err on when we think about addiction is that we think about addiction as you either have it or you don’t,” Weiss said. “And addiction is a continuum, in reality.”
Weiss said that for some alcoholics, a managed alcohol program could be the first step toward complete sobriety.
In the meantime, Weiss said projects like the one in Amsterdam can improve the lives of alcoholics, especially those who have ended up homeless.
“What’s interesting with this program is it’s not about in some ways giving them alcohol,” he said. “It’s actually about giving them community, purpose and meaning.”
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/alcohol-abuse-programs-b-c-amsterdam-moderation-180108310.html

Listen boys and girls, as someone who spent quite a few years with a drinking problem, I can tell you that this program is bullshit!

Abstinence is the only real alternative!